Well... This was ugly, really ugly... Nothing like this happened to me before. I mean, I didn't know he was gay! And... AND, he kissed me, so, WHAT THE FUCK WAS HAPPENING?
Allright, take control Tangerine, calm down.
And, okay, back to the begining... I was, totally and irrevocably (AND naturally)... ALONE. Yeah, I wasn't afraid to say that word, because, actually, I was alone, and nothing was going to change that. (Nothing or no one).
But Jesus Christ! What was I going to do? I didn't have something to entertain with,wait! I'm not saying that my life revolved around men, but they were a bit to make it more fun. Yeah, I had my friends, and music, and a lot of nights to play happily with my band. But was all this going to keep me entertained?
(Let me tell you, I'm SURE AS HELL, that it wasn't going to be enough... But well, it was all I had, and I had to conform with it.)And well, I created an activity to entertain myself as long as I didn't have any guy.
Do you wanna know what was it?
A JOURNAL! Fucking shit! A journal! It never passed through my mind, I had never written in a journal... And, well, this was one of my occurrences.
So, the journal was a little creepy, I mean, if someone would read it, he or she, would automatically stay away from me... And well, here it is, some of my written:
Day One without any men:
Dear Diary, today my neighbour's cat came in through my balcony window... I was softly listening to The Beatles, when he jumped over my head. And there we were, looking each other... And at last, I smiled and told him "Hi". The cat looked at me, and got close, so, we listened to The Beatles together.
Day Two without any men:
Diary, this was the worst day of my life! I felt really bad all the fucking day! And that fucking cat came in through my balcony window once again! I shouted at him, and he just ran away. I went to my balcony, and shouted for a while to my upstairs neighbour. He threatened to call the police, I just told him to fuck up, and I entered to my department.
Note: I would kill my neighbour, but he's so handsome...
Day Three without any fucking men:
Fucking Diary, I still feel really bad! My neighbour complained to the charge about me and all the things I said to him. He told them that I threw an ashtray to his department... But I didn't! Well... yes, I did threw something, but it wasn't an ashtray! I wouldn't threw an ashtray, and you all know it! Don't you?... Well, I gotta meet with my best friend at the Blues Café. So, I'll see you later.
Note: I gotta buy a new ashtray.
Day Four without any men:
Dear Diary, forget about the last two days... I was about to have my period... I feel really good now, I've bought a lot of chocolate and ice cream. A lot of chewing gum, and I'm feeling really calmed. Today I asked my upstairs neighbour to come and drink some tea with me. He brought his sympathetic cat, and now I know my upstairs neighbour's name! His name is Luke, as the drummer of my band! His cat name's Homer, and he's really friendly. Luke and I made peace, and now we're... "friends"? Whatever... He asked me to go someday to his department and watch some movies.
Note: My upstairs neighbour, is a pervert, he stared at my legs too many times.
Day Five without any men:
Dear Diary, I was totally right about my neighbour! He's a pervert! He has a lot of pornographic dvds in his department! When he told me to go to his department, he was inviting me to go and watch pornographic films! And he's Zoophylic! Now I know why he likes so much his cat! My God, this day was totally terrible. I hope to find a guy IMMEDIATELY!
Note: My upstairs neighbour is not a pervert, he's really kind and everything, he's not a zoophylic, and he didn't invited me to watch pornographic films... The thing is that he's really boring. HE INVITED ME TO SEE PS: I LOVE YOU! WHAT THE FUCK?
And everything else, we can ignore it, can't we?
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